ShoX made me complete it with some actual text and stuff. Could be bad PR for Vanilla, had the methods come out… But I’m a nice guy, and I’ll do as ShoX commands. Enjoy (or don’t, if you’re the bitter kind of guy)!
Epsilon eSports - 28/30
KnOxXx – 4/5
numlocked – 5/5
Mike – 5/5
GeaR – 4/5
schocky – 5/5
wltrs – 5/5
Topping the list with an almost perfect score in my entirely subjective, and probably totally incorrect, judgement; is Epsilon eSports. They’ve reformed their roster after their devastating third place at i46, with
F2,
Extremer and
Shintaz leaving the team.
KnOxXx has moved from pocket soldier to his main class medic, leaving the place open for MGE hero (saving the grace of Europe in MGE, beating
TLR at i46)
Mike. If Mike was looking to get some revenge on his former mates in Infused, he’s going to have to pull off some friendly fire, as the demoman and teamleader from
Team Infused is now on his own team.
Numlocked is going to be rocking some huge damage outputs now that he’s surrounded with a team void of finn troublemakers. I couldn’t bear to put a perfect score on Europe’s new superteam, so KnOxXx gets a minus for maybe being a bit rusty on medic, and
GeaR gets a minus for almost quitting TF2 after i46.
Player who needs to step up:
wltrs needs to man up and go to some LAN events!
Player who will carry: numlocked.
BFF - 25/30
Mirelin – 4/5
kaidus – 5/5
Darn! – 2/5
Zebbosai – 5/5
cookye – 5/5
bybben – 4/5
Darn!‘s new lineup features his old partner in crime from the days of
Dignitas dominance – scout extraordinaire
bybben. Partnering bybben on the flank will be
cookye, whom he scouted with on i46, and
Zebbosai, last season’s top soldier and a hotly sought after pick in the latest off-season. Big question here is: who is going to roam on the team? Zebbosai proved last season that he’s the best roamer in Premiership, and Darn! has proved earlier that he’s the kind of pocket no medic wants. Is
Mirelin perhaps going to glue his medic beam onto
kaidus, and let him carry the team? Or maybe Darn!’s had a revelation after his loss-induced rage at i46, and has trained himself to become a better pocket, who knows? Certainly not I, so I will continue to believe Darn! to be one of the worst pockets in Premiership right now.
Player who needs to step up: Darn!
Player who will carry: cookye.
Crack Clan – 20/30
Admirable – 3/5
Retsh0ck – 4/5
Minimoose – 2/5
ipz – 3/5
TviQ – 4/5
smzi – 4/5
Right now, team leader
Admirable‘s probably pretty upset about losing his pocket soldier
MatnuN to a ban. MatnuN has continually been one of the best pockets in Europe for the last 4 or so seasons, and also has played all this time alongside
Retsh0ck, with a good chemistry going. It is a big hole in the team coordination that quickly recruited
Minimoose has to fill, but I think he will do so, after a few weeks/months of practise with the team. Germans
smzi and
ipz are both looking for a real breakthrough in the Premiership division this season, and they are both trying real hard lately, with smzi bringing out a 3.5 KA:D ratio in the Process cup final against
Nitrose.
Player who needs to step up: Minimoose needs to become the next MatnuN.
Player who will carry:
TviQ.
PunchLine – 22/30
k3 – 3/5
Flinn – 3/5
CaptainHax – 4/5
Tek – 4/5
Flippy – 5/5
Plapla – 3/5
PunchLine‘s back for another go at Premiership victory. They made it to the playoffs last season as the first team I’ve seen to come out of division 1 and progress to a top4 placement. PunchLine gained a lot of respect last season as they dealt blows to all the top teams, and question is: was that because of underestimation, in which case the increased respect will only hurt the french team, or was it a case of coordination and tactics, in which case PunchLine will continue to profit from established teamwork and strategies. All teams should watch out for the extremely deadly sniper rifle
Flippy carries with him, and the well-coordinated soldier pair of
CaptainHax and
Tek.
Player who needs to step up:
Flinn is the weakest link in the team, on the strongest class.
Player who will carry: CaptainHax.
Quarantine – 18/30
Kritzonite – 3/5
fuo – 4/5
Baribur – 2/5
Kalhó – 2/5
zappis – 5/5
erectus – 2/5
Quarantine suffered the loss of
Tarkus just before the start of the season, as he was banned for cheating (thanks to
Anakin‘s plug-in). Replacing him in the lineup is probably going to be
Baribur or
Knutsson, two soldiers from their previous lineups. If Knutsson still has the same work times as before, I’d think he’s out of the picture. This team is looking rather ramshackle from the outside, with demoman-turned-scout
erectus partnering up with old
CKRAS-scout
zappis on the flank. That is a very unpredictable scout duo – neither zappis nor erectus have consitently played for a Premiership team for a long time, so who knows how they’ll do against pairs like TviQ/smzi or cookye/bybben.
Fuo has been looking strong on demo lately and is the star on the team in my opinion. It’ll be interesting to see Quarantine play against the other teams of lower Premiership.
Player who needs to step up: Hard to say, but I’ll go with fuo.
Player who will carry: zappis.
EDIT: I’ve given up to Tarkus’s irc-rage and rated zappis to a 5/5. Cheers!
Chinese Mafia - 20/30
Pootash Pierre – 3/5
ups – 3/5
Raliator – 3/5
evokje – 2/5
quad – 5/5
Gubbins – 4/5
This newly formed team got into the Premiership through the tough qualifiers introduced this season. On their way they beat
Naughty Badmen and
uV-gaming in two very close games. They performed above expectations, with
quad bringing out his famous pistol, as well as some clutch spy plays from
Gubbins. His spy’ing was so good it brought out
Byte‘s appreciative comments many times on the cast. My keen eye observes some similaritites between this team and old Premiership teams
Exotic Island and
2stroNg, which promises some surprise results from the team. Hopefully this team won’t follow
Taimou‘s teams’ into the dropped abyss, though.
Player who needs to step up: Certainly not quad.
Player who will carry: quad.
Team Decerto – 17/30
ilike2spin – 2/5
Spary – 3/5
Daleth – 3/5
snyyppis – 2/5
Stark – 4/5
Tack – 2/5
This team advanced from division 1 last name under the name of Avenue eSports. Now they’ve picked up the torch (
Daleth) from the team that advanced to Premiership last season and call themselves
Team Decerto. Daleth and
Spary are the only players on the team with experience playing in Premiership, but they’re not the only ones with experience at the top.
Stark was surprisingly picked to partner
Greg in the Nations’ Cup (be sure to tune in to the final tomorrow evening!), and he has produced some good plays for his country. Question is: will he be able to produce the same results now that he swaps Greg for
Tack? Team Decerto most certainly will be one of the teams fighting to avoid relegation at the end of the season.
Player who needs to step up:
Snyyppis.
Player who will carry: Stark.
Nitrose – 17/30
Evilmoon – 3/5
hys – 3/5
Cyber – 3/5
Traxantic – 2/5
Droso – 3/5
d0nut – 3/5
Nitrose proved that they’re capable of competing with the big guys at i46, giving, amongst others,
TCM-gaming a run for their money in a three-map, dramatic game.
Droso has experience from playing at this level, but he is the only one on his team. Premiership really is a different deal compared to division 1, and I have a feeling Nitrose will suffer from the things PunchLine didn’t suffer from last season. Other than that
Cyber has proved to be surprisingly good at pocket, and
hys and
Evilmoon complements him well in the combo. One of few teams in Premiership to actually have a stronger combo than flank. Will this play into their hands or not? I have no idea!
Player who needs to step up:
Traxantic.
Player who will carry: Cyber.
The first games of the season will decide if I’m a rambling idiot or actually have some insight in this game. Below is the full list of week 1 games. I don’t know what games will be casted, but do watch those that are!
20/9: Quarantine vs Decerto
20/9: BFF vs Epsilon
20/9: Crack Clan vs PunchLine
16/9: Nitrose vs Chinese Mafia





92 comments
TweetRising is a backup.
- # - nice! +4d0nut is the second scout for us.
updated.
- # - nice! +0why is mirelin only 4/5
He’s at least a 6/5.
!
- # - nice! +0Awesome!
- # - nice! +5Getting hyped for Season 13 =D
Minimoose 10/5
Props for taking the time to write this article and making it easy to read, I was thinking of writing a “Preview of the 8 teams” just a few minutes ago because nobody had done it yet.
Several of your ratings are uninformed (IMO). Looks like you gave good ratings to all the “big names”, bad ratings to players who are notoriously bad, and the rest is random?
True. Love the initiative. Would be great to add a few “panellist” opinions, if you have the time, Darkdwarf.
- # - nice! +3Keywords being: “my entirely subjective, and probably totally incorrect, judgement”
- # - nice! +5Yeah I know, so is my post :D
- # - nice! +3Excellent.
But, where the hell is TheSucker?!
- # - nice! +3probably dropping ubers somewhere.
More like MAKING MEDICS DROP UBERS SOMEWHERE.
He’s a soldier for DIS.
- # - nice! +3fun fact: thesucker plays with inverted y axis. maybe it explains why he’s so bad…
Man, that’s so fucked up :D
- # - nice! +0It’s the only way to play.
Inverted x would be more amusing.
- # - nice! +2Im gonna pocket big darn on roam!
I don’t think Darn has ever played pocket soldier nor is he going to play one now. It is funny how he got 2/5 even though he’s the caller. Not that it actually says anywhere what these numbers are supposed to rate.
I reality, player who will carry for Crack Clan is going to be Retsh0ck, right?
- # - nice! +6YOU KNOW IT
- # - nice! +7Nah tviq’s a fucking boss, but I’d say it’s 50% him 50% smzi :)
Minimoose, Mirelin and Zappis should all be 5/5!
Cheers for taking the time to write this piece.
- # - nice! +5Was hoping to see a Shox article, always enjoy reading the abuse he manages to slip into this sort of stuff
Same score as darn, I got diz guys.
- # - nice! +4zappis is definetly the carry for qn atm 5/5
minimoose is (an) animal with a golden lion mane 50/5 , retshock 2 carry cc
mirelin 5/5 best medic movement wise in prem
and spary is also definetly better than 3/5
- # - nice! +5I can agree on Mirelin’s sick movements. I should probably send a demo to GoM or something where I missed like 9 pipes and 10 stickies on Mirelin because I’m so terrible.
- # - nice! +4mirelin has prolly been best med eu, and even atm looking at who plays medic in prem hes a way above the rest :X
want to see more players like him, f2, torden and springer coming back :D
- # - nice! +3Not really, you latvian-biased-person :D. Mirelin’s movement is good, but for instance, KnOxXx’s movement is arguably at the same level, yet he however has better positioning and better uber moments …
Judging from watching kaidus’ stream a bit, Mirelin needs some time to get back in the game and not recklessly run into any given situation.
- # - nice! +3i dont agree to knoxx beeing anywhere close decent at all, hes even more rusty than mirelin and his uber timing is same as anyone from d1
- # - nice! +2mirelin has always been a bit of a spastic but his movement is fucking incredible
- # - nice! +1Darn 2/5 so that BFF have a lower overall score than Epsilon or what?
- # - nice! +1Yeah man, gotta keep Epsilon at the top, or one would wonder if european tf2 was dead.
- # - nice! +0mirelin’s movement = www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2CI_M...
liek dis if u cry evrytim
minimoose 5/5 beautiful gamer
- # - nice! +5Nice that you took time to write the article DarkDwarf, perhaps you can insipire lazy Prem players who will know a lot more than you to start doing coverage for Prem instead. I did feel it lacked an opinion from a few people inside the top level watching/playing in pcws every week, still thumbs up.
What he said ^
- # - nice! +1I think you meant Raliator : 5/3
- # - nice! +7yes
- # - nice! +2aw yeah 3/5 baby
- # - nice! +5FUCK THIS GUY, MINIMOOSE IS 5/5 FOR ME SO DONT LISTEN TO HIM
- # - nice! +2minimoose 666/5 <3
good read.
- # - nice! +2rofl 1/5 2/5 3/5 4/5 5/5 LOL !!!
- # - nice! +1You’re wrong about plapla, he’s totally underated he deserves to be watched coz he do an excellent work, really.
So true.
- # - nice! +1It’s just because plapla has less fragmovies and stuff … this list is just based on “how well do i know this name?”
- # - nice! +2Then why did i got a 2/5 if i had a triple airshot seen numerous times…. Not fair
- # - nice! +0GeaR no 5/5 in this roster? fuck me
- # - nice! +1“KnOxXx gets a minus for maybe being a bit rusty on medic, and GeaR gets a minus for almost quitting TF2 after i46.”
- # - nice! +2all you niggus almost quit whats the point :D
- # - nice! +4you are bad, I dont need your lessons anymore!
- # - nice! +4at least im in that rating :D
- # - nice! +4it must be a mistake!
He, great to see some more discussion again at VTF2 :P Thanks for the article, Darkdwarf! I also appreciate that you rated the players in comparison to their premiership competition and didn’t give everyone a rating from 8 to 9.8, like that ESEA Invite rating article a while ago.
- # - nice! +4I feel like shit now, being the worst scout in prem :( Please carry me Stark and thanks for letting me be your scout partner, this was the greatest honor you could have done to me. You have all my recognition for the rest of my life.
Does it really come as a surprise?!
- # - nice! +3I agree
- # - nice! +0wait what? someone enlighten me.
- # - nice! +2“Fuo has been looking strong on demo lately and is the star on the team in my opinion.
Player who needs to step up: Hard to say, but I’ll go with fuo.”
There are depths in my mind that not even I understand…
- # - nice! +5Most enjoyable read.
- # - nice! +1so mike is going to play pocket? that will be nice to see.
- # - nice! +1ho, btw, 2+2+2+4+3+3=16. It does not only take skill to be that brain damaged, it also takes talent. Thanks for letting you share this moment with us, Darkdwarf.
OUCH someone’s hurting
Happy to help out!
- # - nice! +3Darkdwarf, just for fun, what would have been the rating of tarkus and matnun?
- # - nice! +01337/5
- # - nice! +12/5, 5/5
- # - nice! +0what about russian failers, UV? :3
- # - nice! +3Clearly would have won prem if you just could have beaten those asian mafiosos.
- # - nice! +3x22/5
- # - nice! +6Rating prem players on a 10 scale and then signing it publicly.
You’ve got balls.
- # - nice! +4Three of ‘em.
Well at least you can see 2, 3, 4 and 5 being used. Unlike in that some other player review…
- # - nice! +5darn pocket, you have the insights
- # - nice! +4Fuck VTV Insight, go to Darkdwarf’s brain for real insights!
- # - nice! +1Player that needs to step up for Chinese Mafia: evokje
Player to carry Chinese Mafia: Gubbins
Spy of S13? Gubbins
:D
- # - nice! +3I find it very bizarre that someone can play so poorly for an entire fixture over two maps bar a sniper and 2 spy plays and because byte sucks his cock on air hes heralded as some sort of gaming god. 90+hours every fortnight for fuck knows how long and hes an up coming player who’s just getting back into things?!? The real people getting back into things are, Rali, ups and myself who’ve not played TF2 for 7/8+months until this team formed.
Feel free to keep gobbling up his shit though! :D
Fucking Fansa
fucking LOL that’s one of the best posts I’ve ever read on here
excellent
and I agree (about gubbins, not byte :D)
<3 He pld v well on granary sure the dmg output and stats proved it and badlands he had a poor game as stated, less butt hurt more justificaiton, if u and most ppl know me well I don't credit ppl unless it's due/worthy so...
He put in the time, it showed in 1 map, u played well but I never saw 'star'ing moments nor any dynamic class play so hence not really spotted!
Why butt hurt I dunno, if it helps Fade have a Gold Star -->janelleelms.com/goldstar/image...
Cheers
Byte
- # - nice! +2I have been dire every single map I’ve played in both pcws and officials over the 6 or so nights we’ve played games, I’ll probably continue to play bad till my hands remember how to play the game.. and you think that comment was because you never praised me?! wtf lol.
The comment was merely an observation based on my personal opinion of the cast. Sorry you feel otherwise.
Never said it was because u didn’t get praised, however and outburst like above^ means a Gold Star for u <3
Cheers
Byte
- # - nice! +1I JUST +NICED EVWERYYHITNG ONTHIS FUCKING PAGE -RETARDS
anongallery.org/img/3/7/didnt-...
- # - nice! +0Didn’t TviQ go to Shootmania because he was too good for TF2?
HOLY PLOT TWIST BATMAN
- # - nice! +4That was before Minimoose.
- # - nice! +1Minimoose 2/5 is total bs. It’s 4/5 at the very least, and 8/5 cause it’s fucking minimoose. And retshock will carry that team.
From what I’ve seen from Zappis I wouldn’t rate him 5/5, he doesn’t seem to be quite on the level he used to be.
- # - nice! +25/5 plapla
- # - nice! +4darn would be 5/5 if all the other soldiers didn’t have 10 ping
:DDD
- # - nice! +1Fuo will carry decerto hard btw.
- # - nice! +1Player who needs to step up: Minimoose needs to become the next MatnuN.
- # - nice! +3….
i laughed, certainly hope not.
i.imgur.com/UgyJG.jpg
;( forever 2/5
- # - nice! +7good one mini :D
- # - nice! +0Shintaz caught me on the anakin anti-cheat
- # - nice! +6www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wKxhv...
- # - nice! +3snyyppis 5/5
LOOOOL KALHO 2/5,rly?? Kalho is the best gamer in europe, the only answer that i find is that the guy who made this analysis is retarded. 6/5 for kalho would be a decent evaluation! Carrega kalho, es o melhor soldier do mundo caralho!
- # - nice! +2